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I have been an insomniac for a long time.
Blame all the films I have on my laptop,or Texas Hold ‘Em Poker, or occasionally even work.
2 nights ago, I slept for 16 hours. It felt like the world had changed.
But today, it’s 4.18 A.M., and I just succumbed to the lure of Twilight. Yes, I finally saw it.
I’m sorry, emo teenage girl, it is a retarded stupid film.
Pfft.
To think I wasted my precious whaling-away-time on you.
Any ideas on what could get me to sleep?
Tomorrow is technically the beginning of my 3-day weekend, but I have to be at the Journalism Department by 1.00 P.M. to edit my TV package. Wish me luck!
The night will hopefully bring an interesting experience at the LGBT Society’s Climax party. Fie if you don’t know what that acronym stands for.
On tangent, read the post below this one, and tell me..what would YOU buy?

In the bathroom of the Varisty pub on West Street, Sheffield. I found a machine which dispenses the following.
The pictures speak for themselves.
Apologies for the poor quality.

Exhibit A: The jumping pecker. “Wind me up and watch me go”

Exhibit B: Flashing Nipples. “Brings new meaning to flashing the lads”

Exhibit C: Devil’s Surprise- Mystery Box. At least 3 items!

Exhibit D: Sticky Willy. :\

Exhibit E: Glow-doms. “Condoms that glow in the dark.”

Exhibit F: Vibrating Ring. “For Triple Pleasure.” Free condom included!

Exhibit G: Refillable lighter. “With naughty chat-up lines.”

And finally… *drumroll*

Old Faithful!

Exhibit H: Vibrator. “Quality Smooth Metallic Vibration.”

..and to think that all I really wanted to do was pee.

I have begun to get seriously worried about some e-mails I have been receiving.
No, thank you very much, but I do NOT want to increase the size of my penis by 3 inches, oh Amanda XxX, whoever you may be.
I am a woman…Ask Maya Angelou.

Dear God,
Please, please don’t let me die of this cough.
I promise I won’t smoke so much.
I don’t want to carry cough syrup around like a homeless person.
Love,
Anisha.

http://drop.io/finalwrap862#

My first wrap for a radio bulletin.
Done on November 5th, 2009.

In the 6 weeks that I’ve been in Sheffield, here is a not-so-comprehensive list of what’s happened so me!

1. Met some awesome flatmates. Voula from Cyprus, Lydia from Chennai, Anais from Belgium, Liz from South Africa and Ioana from Romania.
Ioana from Romania, Me, Anais from Belgium, Liz from South Africa

2. Was thrown into coursework from Week 1.
3. Recorded and edited my first vox pop. Question: What is your favourite part of Sheffield, and why?
Have a listen: http://drop.io/6h0pthm/asset/anisha-sharma-favourite-place-in-sh-m4a
4. Filmed and edited my first news story on Diwali in Sheffield with Andrew Kenyon and Dima Hamdallah.
Me and Andrew while filming
Dima and Andrew
5. Got very, very, drunk.
6. Broke my hairdryer.
7. Met my pretty-darn-fhaabyoluz classmates.
8. Went out. Repeatedly.
9. Made many mistakes.
10. Asked the question: “So, why did you decide to do Journalism?” and was met with the answer: “I’m from Leicester!” :S
11. Broke 2 friendships back home.
12. Felt homesick.
13. Told my mum I love her.
14. Missed butter chicken.
15. Met a very cool girl called Shruti Menon.
16. Had a large sambuca Mojito and regretted it.
17. Picked up free shot coupons from the Street.
18. Walked around clicking random pictures of cute couples and scary goth people.
Weird Goth couple

Couple in Sheffield

19. Went to a gay night for Halloween, got hit on by many, many women, and enjoyed every moment.

Halloween.

20. At the same party, got hit on by a man in the women’s bathroom, seconds after he claimed to be a chick.
21. Fought with the boyfriend.
22. Made up with boyfriend. Then he sent me a CD of ghaati Bollywood Music. ❤
23. Used calling cards after ages.
24. Downloaded shitloads of films. 🙂
25. Kiri Little. 🙂
26. Ariana Upnizky.
27. Went to: The Cavendish, The Frog and Parrot, Wok Mania, Burger King, The Common Room, The Devonshire Cat, The Forum, Varsity, Bungalows and Bears, Bia Hoi, The Fusion and Foundry…
28. Filmed a guy posting a letter. Shots included a slightly soft-pornographic close-up of him licking an envelope. In retrospect, not the best idea.
29. Traveled down the A61 a gazillion times in search of the Hindu Samaj.
30. Danced my arse off to Bollywood music.
31. Met an interesting half-Indian, half-Egyptian guy.
32. Met a VERY boring Korean dude.
33. Clicked a picture of some drunk English people on the lawn outside the Union, and was thanked in German.
34. An Italian guy repeatedly says “Kazo” (Pr: Katso). Later found out that it means ‘to fuck’. :S
35. DID LAUNDRY!
36. Wrote bulletins for radio, recorded a voiceover, did a piece-to-camera,learnt how to edit sound files and video on very fancy software and had a voice training session.
37. Learnt that sometimes, filming an adorable girl dancing for 15 minutes CAN be replaced by an interview with the local MP. :S
38. Spread the awesomeness of the word ‘dude’ and HIMYM.

39. Spent time in the library. Working.
40. Heard an English girl say this to a Chinese dude: “So, like, in England, we have Chinese restaurants. Do you have like..English restaurants in China?!?!” 😀

”How is Sheffield?”
”You haven’t even e-mailed me!”
”Are you working down ‘the list’ ”?
I am SO sorry that it’s taken me so long to finally manage to tell you guys (if anyone is interested) what’s going on.
First things first: Welcome to Bobadspeak! This is my official I’m-in-the-UK-and-I-want-to-show-off-about-it space. Is that a look of curiosity I see on your face? Bobad, you ask? Yes. Bobad.
Ladies and gentlemen, the history of the word Bobad goes back to around 2005. My boyfriend at the time used to call me Bobo, and Anusuya Tandon, in a burst of genius, decided to give me my Bhojpuri nickname. And by God, it’s stuck. 🙂
So, now that the formalities and history lessons are done with, on to what I’ve been up to in Sheffield!
When some of you last saw me, I was kicking you out of my house while you laughed at how much luggage I was carrying. 😛 (Bhoomika and Nikhil, this does not apply to you. 🙂 )
One of you last heard me crying on the phone in the airport about how much I was going to miss everyone.
After that came a long-ass haul to Heathrow where 2 shots of rum knocked me out cold (*ashamed*), a stopover where I had my first taste of orgasmic British ham, and then a 35-minute flight to Manchester, where I was received by the aptly-yet-cheesily-name ‘Meet and Greet’ Service. 4 hours later (I was kind of excited to see traffic 😉 ) I was in Opal 2- a student accommodation complex with Blocks A-H (I think it could be F), a laundry, common room and health club. The first thing that excited me about Opal was how hi-tech it was. My key opens the door to the entire block, the door to A block, the door only to Flat 12, and only to flat D within said flat.
After the initial reverie was over and done with, panic kicked in:
”They don’t have bedding!”
”There is no WAY that THIS cupboard is going to fit all my clothes!”
”OMFG! Where am I going to hang my chaddis?????”
Thus began a series of events so well-planned and executed that I’m sure Noah was looking down on me and my mum going, ”Dude, now THAT is awesome.”
I like to call it Steps to an awesomer you!

Essential Provisions:

1. Nerves of steel. (Or balls, where applicable).
Be prepared for this: You will embark on your trip with thiiiissss much money:
Money money money!
…and you will come back with this much money.
Image0469

(That, by the way, is a 5p coin).

2. Financial backing (or sponsorship).
[Read: Parental love/hard-earned dough].
When it comes to this point, an undeniable fact is that the harder you work to procure said finances, the less eager you will be to spend it.

3. Sturdy shoes.
Girls, shopping in heels is NOT a god idea, especially in a hilly are like Sheffield. Ask the poor Caucasian female I saw curled up in a corner of Marks and Spencer’s, cradling her feet. 😐

4. A list of things you need.
This will keep you more or less on track. Nevertheless, you are bound to go and buy more (if you are of a female disposition) or less (if you are of a male or Anisha disposition) than is required. Suddenly, a doorstopper, or a bookmark will seem like excellent ideas, ladies, while cleaning liquid and utensils might take a back seat, boys.
This is why number 5 on my list is THE MOST IMPORTANT provision of all!! (*Thunderous voice*)
*drum roll………………….*

5. A Sensible Companion. (SC)
Uncles, you need your aunties. Babies, bring your babas. An SC is by far THE most essential thing on a shopping extravaganza. There came a point when I rushed out of a trial room in a store screaming, “MAKE THE MADNESS STOP! I CAN’T TRY ON ANY MORE COATS, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Hearing this, my SC (Mummy) clonked me on the head, spun me around a few times, handed me 3 more coats, and sent me back inside. Thank you, Ma. I owe you one.

After having acquired everything I needed (yes, I now have a place to hang my chaddis), I proceeded to fit into a life entirely different from mine. That was one month ago. And what a journey it’s been. 🙂

Thank you for reading my welcome post!
Next: What’s been happening since 19th September?
Stay tuned. 🙂